Getting Over Fears: Lowering The Gradient So As To Meet Up With Women And Relate To Girls
Last week one of my close friends asked a question that i thought was worth discussing. He asked me how to overcome fears that pop up at times - even when everything is going good.
The truth is it's not at all an easy question to answer as it varies for every person. There are literally thousands of books that have been written on that subject only. However, one of the best techniques I have used to overcome my fears usually involves lowering the gradient.
What are gradients? Gradients are just like steps on a ladder. If you try to reach the top of the ladder on your first step, it will be impossible and you may fail. If you keep trying it over and over you may start building up a "complex" about failing, and soon not try anymore.
If you try to jump up five or six steps in your first try, it will also be frightening - not necessarily impossible but scary. Probability is that if you have no experiences leaping that high you will fail too.
The right approach is to take the first step and then advance one-step at a time. It is the most secure method to climb a ladder.
Here are some examples of how I apply that to get over fears that pop up in meeting women and dating women:
As most guys do, I often go out to meet women in a social setting. Sometimes it is especially scary. So I am approaching an attractive woman in a social setting, instead of telling her how beautiful she is and how much I am attracted to her (that exposes my fear of being shot down in front of a lot of people and embarrassed) I lower the gradient of approach and simply say "Hi." If a girl likes you or is interested in you she will find a means to continue the conversation. If she doesn't then i understand she is not interested in me and the simple "Hi" just appears that I am friendly - not necessarily even flirting - thus I don't feel shot down in front of other people.
If I am starting to date a girl and I feel fearful taking the next step of trying to get intimate with her, I don't ask her "Would you like to get intimate?" I take a lower gradient and ask her if she wants to chill, get cozy, and just watch TV at my house. If she doesn't want to get intimate she surely won't want to be alone with me, getting cozy at my house. Or rather than trying to suddenly "kiss her", I will simply hold her hand or give her gentle touches every now and again to discover how responsive she is to my touch. If she likes my touch she will start touching me back to give me the go ahead signal.
These are a few examples. When you feel uncomfortable and fearful just try to consider a lower gradient that isn't as frightening and allows you to make forward progress toward your goal. If you do this you will know how to meet women and how to relate to them very quickly.
Perfect First Dates Are Feasible - Easy Ways You May Experience Wonderful First Dates
Just the idea of a perfect first date can throw us into a panic mode, as we put so much stress on ourselves. The fear of rejection is strong in most of us...
Is Mr. L. Rx A Scam? Is His Book Dating To Relating Another Mislead?
Mr. L. Rx says somewhere on his website "Why double your dating when you can 10 x it?" And this is comparably the truth. From personal experience the order of magnitude of his technology will get you about 5 times as many women as any of the other technologies.
Is David Deangelo A Typical Fraud? Is His Data Double Your Dating A Con?
Is David Deangelo a scam? Well, my first reaction is to say no, as he does provide a very good service to men. He really gives us a lot of useful data on how to meet women.
Is Mystery A Scam? Is The Mystery Method A Scam?
If you simply want to be a pick up artist, then Mystery' system will work, although you will probably find that Mr. L. Rx's system works for PUA's even better and that you might end up with the kind of a woman you want if you go with Mr. L. Rx's system.
What You May Need To Discover Concerning Tiffany Taylor And Guy Gets Girl
Is Guy Gets Girl a Scam? Is Tiffany Taylor a Scam? If you are a guy looking for a system that will work stand alone, don't waste your money on this one. THIS IS A SCAM! = 1
The Facts Of Online Dating Services For Girls
In the past, i.e. the 1990's, online dating was a brand new idea. Unlike today, most people did not own PC's or even have access to the internet. Times have changed. Online dating is not only IN the mainstream, it IS the mainstream.
An Intro About David Deangelo, His Suggestions Along With His Beliefs
David Deangelo is an American author and the mastermind behind many well known training programs, specializing in dating and attracting the opposite sex. Most of his books have been marketed online and offer coaching advice to single men and women worldwide.
Here's How To Get Intimate With A Woman
Getting physical is something that usually occurs naturally between a man and a woman over a three month period unless one or both of them is extremely uncomfortable on disinterested. |
Related Articles
Blogroll
|
